When can kids decide on their own which parent they want to live with?

There is no set age in N.C. as to when this can occur. It is in the Judge’s discretion whether to speak to children and give them any input into the determination. Judges vary as to what age children they will speak to. Some will speak to a child as young as 10 or 11 while others are unwilling to talk to children until they are 15 or 16. It will only be one piece of the evidence that the Court considers and will not be determinative by itself. The Court also will not speak to a child in chambers unless both parents agree.